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Diva with Depression

The pain of depression without the filter.

The Tale of Two Fathers.

I have two fathers. Now, most people say that with excitement and pride. Me- not so much. My daddy was a loving man. I'm named after him. He was far from perfect. But he loved me. Even when I was... Continue Reading →

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OH THE SHAME!!!!

#fbf

Diva with Depression

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I had hit rockbottom. I had three breakdowns. One of which was at work. I couldn’t care for my house. All of the friends I thought I had were gone. I had no family around. I wanted to shrivel up and fade away.
You see, no one tells you that the shame from having this illness can be worse than actually having it. You can practically, if not actually, hear the whispers.
“Ooh, she’s crazy.” “How could she let herself get like that.” “What does she have to be depressed about?”
I had friends who were at my house for parties, dinners, bookclub. When I got sick, crickets. One person was with me EVERYDAY at work. I have yet to hear from her.
Family, HMPH! Their whispers were the loudest. And most painful. The lack of phone calls, texts, hell, I would have taken a card, was hurtful.
I often…

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Welcome to my world

Diva with Depression

Sadness. Hopelessness. Lack of Energy. Suicidal thoughts. No desire to even maintain daily hygiene.

These are just a few of the symptoms of depression. Manic depression. Bipolar Disorder. Just to name a few.

These feelings can last anywhere from a day to…….forever.

I believe I’ve always had some form of depression. I would cry for no particular reason. I would shut down in some way or another. Most of the people brushed it off as being sensitive. Or dramatic. Depression in children is often overlooked. “What do you have to be depressed about? You’re a child!!”

Depression is a disease. It’s just as deadly as heart disease or diabetes. It’s also hereditary, much like those diseases.Millions of people suffer daily, but few are treated properly. Treatment is hard to find and expensive. Why is it ok to treat physical illnesses but ignore mental illness? It’s not.

Women are raised to…

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Relationships- The casualties of Depression.

A few months ago, a family member got angry with me because of a breakdown in communication. I was really hurt by how they addressed me, but I apologized. In my mind, it's always my fault. Recently a friend became... Continue Reading →

Sleep? What’s that?

At around 11PM: This is how it all begins. Usually I'm at least 24 hours into an episode of insomnia. My eyeballs are seeing eyeballs. I can't sit up. The TV is just an object. So I get excited. Put... Continue Reading →

The Village Failed…

The news has been chock full of stories about suicide lately. And the death of babies who were abandoned and abused. It forced me to question: Where is the village? I grew up believing that there was always supposed to... Continue Reading →

BEING ME…….

I've been a daughter and sister for 50 years.I have been a mommy for 26 years.And I was a partner for 27 years. Now, I'm all alone. Depressed.Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. I know. I have family. I have friends.... Continue Reading →

DRUG DU JOUR….

PSA: I am not a sponsor. I don't get paid by anyone. I'm a broke blogger. I don't own the rights to anything. Ok then. Zoloft. Prozac. Wellbutrin. Cymbalta. Paxil. Lithium. Remeron. Effexor. Geodon. The list goes on. Take this... Continue Reading →

How You Doin????

Hi Everyone!! I'm so very sorry for the long pause. As you know, my life is a series of roller coaster dips. My coaster got stuck in the last drop and I've been there ever since. You know that I... Continue Reading →

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